|Crossword No. 5,678,709
By: René Tsil.
Solvers are invited to identify the lop-sided diagram. Cut it out and put it straight before attempting to fill it in.
The clues are normal but each answer arrived at makes the name of a Polish basketball-player spelt backwards except for 3 which is a palindromic strip-tease artist.
1 Across: Taken for a ride with 2, though 3 is unsurprised. By joy? --- No! 9- and 7- letter words.
Three of the answers have to drop a letter; the letter so dropped must then
be added to the beginning of the straightforward answer except one which
must be placed on the end of one of the answers to make an antipodean
1) Educate a relation in ovi-extraction.
2) Umbratile Truandiser!
3) Kerry Packer goes round Barsetshire? - For example.
4) Doffing the clapperdudgeon, or so they say in Midlothian. 5-letter words.
These must be deduced from the remainder of the 87 letters when the other answers have been entered in the diagram. All words may be found in Webster's Eurodictionary, or Eric Partridge's Dictionary of New Zealand Milkmen's Slang.
First rearrange the clues so that they acronymically spell out one of the more accessible operas of Saalinen. You then have the right order.
1) Anguiform Xiphosura loses out.
2) Gumphion smashed subrogative fish, we hear.
3) Going mad yet?
4) Serves you right for having nothing better to do!
5) Glagolitic turboprop produces epidemic.
6) Gluttons for punishment, apparently.
7) IQ of only 600?-Thicko!
8) Where the bee sucks there suck I, euphemistically
Each answer, when anagrammatised, forms the name of a famous eighteenth century halieuticist.
1) Here you go again!
2) It can be addictive.
3) And it can send you blind.
4) So watch it.
Solution to 5,678,708:
Notes: Erna Eroticala is a popular singing person. Plot Le Peddler was a left-handed lutanist. Twink Enceinte is French for a pregnant ballet-dancer. Antata T Diance-the term "Thé Dansant" is pseudepigraphically ascribed to this composer of church music. Astoral Luters and Rios Poltdento were serpent-players of the seventeenth century for whom Rae Concertinu wrote his famous "Double Serpent" concerto. They both died of plague before it was completed and Neverso Noints and Thrace Rosella performed it in 1678, which is 8761 spelt backwards which is the number of avocado pears that Large Lamestet ate in an Avocado Pear Eating Championship in 1931. The record was previously held by C.T.E.R. Legat Skar who ate an unrecorded amount in 1920.
Crossword Setters' Dinner:
Only one solver, the new headmaster of Gordonstoun, has submitted correct solutions to crosswords 5,678,600 to 5,678,708 and is being invited to take a cup of cocoa with the setters after they have had their meal in The Jude, The Obscure Rooms, Quips and Quiddities Hotel, Dorchester: The setters have instructed me to record disappointment at this poor result.
Punch June 21 1978